[_Gone_far from here]'s diary

89816  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2006-12-14
Written: (6555 days ago)
Next in thread: 89822

*lowers head covering my face with my hands* I don't know what to do anymore, alls i know is love, deep true love. And everbody is telling me its wrong...that i'm wrong. i can't keep anybody happy anymore, like i can't be what ppl want me to be. and i want to be me. I've had four friends stop talking to me alltogether b/c i got a bf, how stupid is that? is a grudge worth a good friendship? *shaeks head* i dont understand, i wish i could be everthing to everyone, but i can't make every body happy, and i matter a little. I love him....and i want to stay with him....but i don't want to lose all my good friends. and if they leave me for having a bf are they truely my friends?
*silently sobs* i don't know waht to do, i only know Love and i must follow.
   <3 ["LOVE HAS GIVEN ME WINGS SO I MUST FLY"] <3

89661  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-12-12
Written: (6557 days ago)

its offical i'm in love, like real love. and its for him. and for once i really think he loves me back. i have a hope, a beliefe and strenght in this love that i hve never had befor. its unexplainable, all i know is its there. I'm loveing every moment of this hes always on my mind ^_^ and i love. It gives me chils every time i think there is someone out there that feels the same way about me as i do them. that there is someont out there that loves me

89512  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-12-09
Written: (6560 days ago)

I FINALY FOUND MY BETTER HALF!!!! I REALLY REALLY like him maybe even love him. the first guy i have EVER felt this strong about. and i can't wait to get even closer to him ^_^ i'm going to give it my all. i have some one that cares for me, i have a boy friend ^_^ a luv

89385  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2006-12-07
Written: (6562 days ago)

*shakes head* i want to believe so bad, i do hes in my head all the time i cant get his picture out of my mind. but its always happend! i fall head over heals for a guy and then they turn around rip myheart out and leave me alone for dead. *sighs* it always seems "diffrent" and i want to believe and try and i am i will NeVeR give up b/c i CANT but i jstu don't want to get hurt Again. i dunno if i should let out my love i might scare him off, or he might just drif like all the others. Do i let out my love and take the risk again? i know i should but it always seems to end in pain. always has with me, no guy that i have seen has deeply cared for me from the bottem of their heart...not even my own fucking father!....*sigh* you jsut learn to numb yourself after a while, i want to get out of that numb but is so hard to and such a risk.
Like this is the first guy in a LoNg time that ive really REALLY liked and acctuly thought was a good shot and i think he cares i hope he does b/c i think i'm realy gunna try.

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