I FINALY FOUND MY BETTER HALF!!!! I REALLY REALLY like him maybe even love him. the first guy i have EVER felt this strong about. and i can't wait to get even closer to him ^_^ i'm going to give it my all. i have some one that cares for me, i have a boy friend ^_^ a luv

*shakes head* i want to believe so bad, i do hes in my head all the time i cant get his picture out of my mind. but its always happend! i fall head over heals for a guy and then they turn around rip myheart out and leave me alone for dead. *sighs* it always seems "diffrent" and i want to believe and try and i am i will NeVeR give up b/c i CANT but i jstu don't want to get hurt Again. i dunno if i should let out my love i might scare him off, or he might just drif like all the others. Do i let out my love and take the risk again? i know i should but it always seems to end in pain. always has with me, no guy that i have seen has deeply cared for me from the bottem of their heart...not even my own fucking father!....*sigh* you jsut learn to numb yourself after a while, i want to get out of that numb but is so hard to and such a risk.
Like this is the first guy in a LoNg time that ive really REALLY liked and acctuly thought was a good shot and i think he cares i hope he does b/c i think i'm realy gunna try.