I have developed a really bad habit.. Every now and then i'll just yell something at the top of my voice, for no reason whatsoever. Just random noises most of the time, sometimes words. It's really bizarre. I'll just feel this build up of tension, then eventually i'll scream something pointless XD it's highly amusing, but a little worrying o_O

OMG lol, Char XD XD <333

Me: ...But that's rape... Isn't it? You agree with non-consenting-ness in your manga?!
Char: OH COME ON! When are they EVER none consenting?! They always bloody go "NO NO NO oh go on then." ..There's no such thing as rape in Yaoi...
Me: ...Just violent sex?
Char: Violent and stereotypical sex. Usually involving cat ears. And cream and strawberries for some reason. Or jam.
Me: LOL jam.

God that made me nearly wet myself laughing, it really did XD Seriously, i love her so much X3 Why the hell she has to move away to Bristol i'll never know XD she only comes back once every few weeks, it's so depressing! Oh well, we can still have our pervy conversations over the phone! All is not lost! XD

</ramble AGAIN> (sorry)

YOU WILL NOT DEFEAT ME DA!!!!!!

Lololol, no i just went and joined Y-Gal instead of lurking around like a lurking pervert... cuz Ladychimera, Fedini and GDD all have accounts over there too XD XD Stop me looking at mature content art now DA *sticks tongue out* ...Yeah, i'm mature. Honestly though... DA is digging itself a nice deep grave here... And as someone said once (i think it may have been Adam) "Well, you've dug the grave, so you might aswell sleep in it." ...It makes no sense, but it sounds good! So yes DA, go and sleep in your bloody grave!! I will find loopholes in your stupid system... Like... Well joining Y-Gal and Sheezyart for one thing... YES I AM GOING TO JOIN YOUR RIVAL SITE ACTUALLY!!!! YES!!!! That's what happens when you deny me my freedom!!!! So la-di-da to you, fascists!!!! *waves flag with 'poo' written on it* if you're going to treat me like an immature teenager, I WILL ACT ACCORDINGLY!!!!!!!!


In other news, i like my men how i like my coffee..........







In a plastic cup. With a spoon in them.






That is all.







</ramble of crapness> 

*grumbles* waiting for AMV Hell 4 to download... it's the last one they're doing! I'm dead upset, i really love ALL the AMV Hells ;__; i will indeed be pining for an AMVH 5 XD

Omg, i know i'm always quoting Em in this, but she's just so damned funny i can't help it XD Well, i find her funny X3 We were chatting via webcam at about 4am last night:

Me: I just always see Saix as this pathetic little puppy creature..
Em: Nuu, he's no puppy! He's awesome!
Me: I never said he wasn't.. But for some reason i can't draw him as none-pathetic.
Em: (in a pathetic voice) Saix is my world i live in!

and that just made me LOL so hard XD I don't know what it is, but that woman can always make me laugh like a lunatic. I swear she pumps laughing gas down her microphone and it somehow comes out of my speakers o___O And another moment:

Em: You know, the Mansex joke is almost getting old.
Me: Almost.
Em: You know what isn't though? The Xigbar anagram joke.
Me: There's a Xigbar anagram joke?
Em: Mmmhm. You can remix his name into Bigrax.

I absolutely died when she said that. She just said it so casually, while eating ice cream XD i almost died laughing. Seriously. I knew you could remix his name as Bigrax, but i've NEVER heard anyone say it out loud. I didn't realise how funny it was XD BIGRAX!! Seriously...

So the Orgy now has Mansex (^Xemnas), Bigrax(^Xigbar), Mr.Porn (^{Xaldin..don't ask XD}), Vixen (^Vexen), Marlicksya (^Marluxia), Sexion (^Zexion) and Mc.Flurry (^{Axel.. aka: Flurry of Dancing Flames or whatever it is...}) Omg... It's so sad that we have nicknames for imaginary characters XD but it's so funny! X3

Boooooored... AMVH 4 is taking bloody forever... 5% done OAO it's gonna be ages >_< i might go and get a snack, or watch the whole of KH stupid files again... Aaah, the stupid files <3 my crack.

</mainly KH orientated ramble>

I'm in a better mood today =) i was right, last night was just a Sunday night downer. I had a good day today, bumming around with all the cool people XD I really do love my friends, no matter how down i'm feeling they can always cheer me up. Me and [Lexxi Scuzz] discovered the best way to get rid of Dominic (this really annoying kid who tags around with our crowd). You just stand at grin manically at him for about 5 minutes, and eventually he runs away XD it was amazingly funny. And Leigh kept barking at him, which was also amusing. Aaaah, times we will always remember <_< >_> Now some may be thinking 'aww, you mean person! BULLY!' but trust me, Dom totally brings it on himself. He's a complete ass. I'll level with y'all, we have a very specific friendship group, and while it's big, it's very obvious who's 'in' and who's most definately 'out' of the clique. Dom is out, but he acts like he's in. And i know it sounds mean to say that, but to tell the honest truth, he's a complete prick. I'd be happy to include him, as i'm sure many other people would be, if he wasn't such a complete jerky fag end! Seriously, all he does is slag people off and cause fights... He's too cocky and thinks he's king of the universe despite the fact that he has no friends. He wears a pink shirt ffs. Some guys can do that and be cool. He can't. Ok, i sound like such a cheerleader bitch now XD I don't mean to, but he really is an ass.. anyway, i've lost the track completely now, what was i talking about?? Oh i've totally forgotten... Nevermind... Aaaah, the conversation i just had with Em made me lol. We were talking over webcam, cuz we're technological geniuses like that. I was writing up my CV at the same time as talking to her XD

Me: *clicks teeth* (something i do when i'm concentrating)
-long silence-
Me: *clicks teeth again*
-long silence-
Em: ...did you just click at me?!
Me: *dies laughing* I totally forgot about the webcam!
Em: I find your clicking offensive!!!!

Ok, it's probably not funny at all to most people, but we found it hysterical so stfu! >___<

OMG, recently i've started speaking in IM. I say lol, rofl, omg, wtf, ftw and stfu out loud ALL the time >_< I can't help it!

Me and Rach got to write all over the walls in the art department today (Y) twas awesome.

That's all i have to say.

</ramble>

*thinking about life, the universe, and everything*

I'm in a generally very down and depressed mood. Em did cheer me up a little though, bless her.

Sora: What do you guys really want?
Xal: More suitable travelling clothes.
Beast: No, my precious Xaldin!

XD aaaah, that did make me lol =3 i can always rely on KH crack to cheer me up when i'm in one of these 'life is hopeless, why bother' moods. KH crack IS my anti-drug. Dunno where i'd be without it :p

*sigh* this is probably just one of those Sunday night downers, but i feel really low at the moment... I'll get into school tomorrow and see all my friends and think 'This is why i'm alive! What was all that fuss about?!'

Ahahahaha, oh Emily. Become a world leader, please. She knows how to cheer me up that woman XD ::

Me: I dunno, i just feel really down... The hopelessness of life is getting to me.
Em: ...You know, life is like a big angry bull. Sometimes you just have to grab the bull by the horns, give it a big hug, and introduce it to yaoi. Honestly, it works.
Me: o___O

She's right of course. Well, about the grabbing the bull by the horns, not the hugging and the yaoi. Although that helps. Really. XD I guess i've been way to busy moping about how life is so difficult, instead of sticking out my elbows and barging my way through life regardless of the problems it throws at me... As a true Johnson should! Aye, i am proud of my heritage i'll have you know. But really. My family has had it tough through the generations, but they've all come out victorious. Ok, the Johnsons are not the richest family in the world, but they're some of the craziest, happiest and most awesome people i know. Whenever i go down to visit the Johnson side of my family, i just feel like i've found my home. And they've all been the kind of people to flip the bird at order and live life in the way they want. That's what i'm going to do. I don't care if i don't get rich, and i'm not successful. If i die happy, that's good enough for me. Aye.

Well, amazingly enough, the path seems clearer now o___O I had a depressing rant in my ET diary, a rant at Em, then a rant of realisation in this diary! All in a days work o___O I feel better now... NOW i'm going to go and sleep XD night all! xxx

</ramble that wasn't meant to happen>

...I have seriously pointy shoulder blades o___O WTH?!

Oh em gee! I'm always doing this... I come online, pansy about a bit, check DA, check ET + EP, check LJ, check youtube (omg, i have friends on there now XD), check all the forums i hang on, then sit here like a gorm staring into space. Eventually i get bored and come and rant in my diary. I shouldn't be ranting in my diary... Me and Emsy did a 1o1 (one on one) rp a while back when i first discovered Kingdom Hearts (and the world pretty much ended because i discovered 12 men who are very obviously gay and wonderfully fun to slash >:3 hehe..)... Aaaaanyway, the RP incorporates our OC's. Toxik is mine, who i created yonks ago specifically for the RP then abandoned on the shelf, and Xanthor is hers... Eeeh, but that's not important... The important part is that i'm supposed to be writing up the RP in story form. But i'm not. I'm sitting here rambling in my diary ¬____¬ It was a request. But noooo, i'm sitting here staring into space and drawing crap. CRAP. Omg... Right, i'm going to stop ranting now before i give myself a migrane. Gotta go write... *pootles off*

</ramble>

I am so effing bored...

I should totally be tired. Seriously. I was up sooo freaking late last night, mainly because my brain wouldn't stfu for two seconds so i ended up lying on the couch ranting like a mad tramp for hours. Apparently i kept Alex up even though she was like upstairs XD Sorry dear! My brain had alot to say, and i didn't have access to my EP diary :O which is tragic. Ok, i did have access, but it was in the other room, so whatever. Anyway. Yeah. So i woke up with this REALLY bad pain across my chest, and i was like 'wtf, am i having a heart attack?!' then it turns out that Alex had the same thing... So i don't know what the hell it is, but it hasn't gone away yet =( very upsetting. I bet it was because we went for a walk in the middle of the night and it was FREEZING cold... We probably both caught pneumonia or something. If i'm dying, i totally blame Josh. It's all his fault.

My GOD i am so unbelievably bored. It's not right for a human to be this bored. If God existed he would NOT let me get this bored. Because i act like a jerk when i'm bored. I act like a jerk most of the time, but moreso when i'm bored. Seriously. Oh well.

Half day tomorrow, which is grrrreat! Like Frosties <_< >_> ...I have to go to Tesco because my stupid mother didn't understand my shopping list! I asked her to buy butter pop corn and she hasn't and i'm craving it sooo badly, and people should know NEVER to get in the way of a pmsing woman and her cravings. Lol, you so didn't need to know that. But yeah, it may be something to do with the fact that i wrote this on the list:
Popcorn (butter&salt pl0x)
...I don't think she knows what pl0x is, so she just ignored it XD probably thought i would set off a bomb and incinerate the universe if she got popcorn... i don't know, my family is retarded, but we seem to be getting on a hell of a lot better than we used to recently, which is good. Now i just need to sort out the rest of my life... Oh wait, it's sorted! Omg! Hey, look everyone, my life is reasonably stable and good at the minute! Let's have a party or something!

Only issue i'm having at the moment is boyfriend. I've only been with him a week and i'm beginning to get bored already. I don't know what it is with me... One minute i'll be over the moon, on top of the world and surfing on the sun (i made that one up :P) and the next i'll be like 'bitch, please ¬__¬' whenever he tries to speak to me. Seriously, my brain has something wrong with it. I want a boyfriend. I get a boyfriend. I don't want it anymore. GAH! Hah, i get pocky if it lasts over a week though, so i'm thrilled XD I feel like such a bad person now... whatever, i probably am a bad person. Maybe my brain will decide whether or not i want to be single soon.

Omg, Emily just told me that i should be a gay guy O__O that is really worrying, because she's like the 8th person to say that to me in the last week. I don't get it. But yeah, i think i was a gay guy in a past life or something <_< >_> XD

I'm so bored of this now... I'm so bored that i think i'm actually going to go to bed... Else i'll never get up in time for school tomorrow. OMG school, i so can't be bothered... Oh well, i need to get that popcorn before i die from my cravings, so that's one good reason to head off into good old Mold. Seriously though, there can be nothing good about a place called Mold.

I'm going to bed now.

</ramble>

^{[Chris Crocker is my hero <333 Just to let you know XD]}

Ok. Back to ranting. My mind has literally torn itself in half now. So i'm writing from the two different perspectives i'm having, to make this easier.

1: Joe was totally right. Having people close to you, loving people and caring about them only gets you hurt in the end. Having a best friend who says she's better off without you, and is realising who her true friends are as if 4 years of hell and happiness have meant nothing hurts more than you can imagine. Something inside me is telling me that he was right all along, and that we were the stupid ones telling him he was depressed and needed help and that no one can survive completely on their own. But i think we can. So, if this side of my mind wins out, i'm breaking all ties as soon as i'm well enough to go back to school. No friends, no boyfriend, nothing like that. Because recently all it seems to be causing me is pain. I've relied on my friends for far too long, it's time to start relying on Me, Myself and I. I'm not going for the 'love only yourself' angle, but more the 'hate only yourself'. I don't feel like i deserve to have all the amazing people i have/had in my life, so i'm not going to have them anymore. I'll take them away, and i'll be better off for it in the end, because when eventually the time comes for me to leave, it won't hurt nearly as much as it would. My God. I sound so much like Sasuke it's terrifying. Breaking bonds and surviving alone, but i think it's the best way for me to go, because i'll only end up hurting people if i don't do this. Hurting myself is ok... But i've had enough of hurting other people. I'm seeing the world differently. I look at people and think 'I can't let myself get close to them. I'll only end up hurting them.' ...I know i'm probably not making any sense... Fever does weird shit to me... Stupid brother and his stupid stomach bug or whatever the hell this is that i have... Maybe God does exist and he's punishing me for being such a bitch to the world. Good. I deserve it.

2: I'm being stupid and over-emotional. I DO need people, and friends, and love, more than anything else in the world. I need my best friend, even if she's said some pretty hurtful stuff, i'm willing to accept that this silliness has been a misunderstanding and forget about it. I need my boyfriend, even if he is a tit sometimes, he's always a shoulder to cry on. I need my other friends, all of whom i hold dear and i don't know what i'd do without them. I need my family and everything that i have at the moment. All this nonsense these last couple of days has been a relapse into the person i used to be. The cold, hateful, bitter person who thought she could survive on her own without anybody and ended up nearly destroying her own life as a result. I don't want to be her again... Well part of me doesn't... And part of me does... Part of me thinks it would be better that way... And part of me is screaming 'No, no you're making a huge mistake!' ...But all this 'i need..' nonsense makes me sound like such a... burden. A burden to other people. Maybe i'm trying to convince myself that i don't 'need' anything... What the hell am i trying to prove here?? What is the matter with me... Where is my mind going? Wherever it is i get the horrible feeling that i can't follow it... I feel like i'm becoming less and less... what's the best way to describe it? Human? ...Whole. Complete. My mind doesn't feel like it's a part of my body anymore.. I just feel like a bystander, watching myself and thinking 'What a prick.' ...But i don't know how to fix it... WHAT THE FUCK IS THE MATTER WITH ME, of course i know how to fucking fix it.. Stop being a moron, hug all your friends, everything will be ok... i'm sick of it being like that though, fucking 'everything will be fine as long as i have my friends' it sounds like some kind of shitty movie... But i do need my friends, as much as i hate to admit it, i don't think i'd be me without them... Or am i someone else at the moment and i need to go back to being myself?? WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS GOING ON WITH ME, I FEEL LIKE I'M LOSING MY MIND, AND OVER WHAT?! A realisation that my friends don't need me as much as i need them? Yes. That's probably what it is. The realisation that i haven't been myself for 5 FUCKING YEARS!!! No one, but NO ONE, knows the real me! WELL HERE SHE FUCKING IS WORLD!!!!! DO YOU LIKE IT?!?! I FUCKING HOPE NOT, BECAUSE I DON'T!!!! Here's the real fucking me, the me that only one person ever really met!!! Hello, wie gehts, how's life for all of you out there today?! I'm just fucking great, having a whale of a time, whatever that supid freaking phrase means. Bye bye, i'm bored now.

Right then... Well i suppose i have alot to say, but i'm not entirely sure how to say it... If i've ever felt like i have split personalities, it's now. My mind seems torn, and for the first time in my life, my heart is being torn two ways aswell... How stupid does that sound? I'm not the loving kind, people know that. I hate to get attached to boys, not because i don't like commitment, but because i'm terrified of getting close to someone and losing them. Now i'm starting to get close to my current boyfriend, and part of me is enjoying it, and part of me feels like it's falling apart... I don't know why, i don't know what's the matter with me. I've been in a vile mood all week so far.. I've lashed out at people i love and hold dear (and at total strangers aswell.. threatening year 7's with quick and painful death o___O) i've refused to go home, i've fought with myself over what the hell i'm doing. I had a fight with my mum and for the first time in my life i actually, genuinely felt like i was capable of grabbing a knife and stabbing someone. Half of my mind has been like that. Violent, moody, anti-social and about as tolerant of people as an angry wasp suffering from severe PMS... The other half of my mind has been... i don't know, relaxed? I'm not sure... I can't describe it... Part of me is looking in the mirror and thinking 'wtf, kill yourself now, you're an awful person' and the other half is thinking 'who cares, this is you. Deal.' ...I can't decide which half i agree with... And all this conflict and crying and pushing people away from me is over Josh and my desperate need to be alone but still loved... An impossible concept really. And the sad thing is, i think this is all because i just can't let Joe go completely. I'm still clinging on to the few tiny little whisps of what we had when he was alive... And that's what's causing all this immense conflict in my brain. I feel happy when i'm with Josh, but also like i'm cheating Joe in some way... I also get the intense feeling that alot of people want me dead at the moment. I'm the most paranoid, self concious person in the world, and i'm convinced that everyone is turning against me... You know that feeling when you're standing in a huge crowd but you feel totally, utterly, completely alone? Ever had that? Like you're in a glass bubble and you want to reach out to people, but can't quite reach. Gah, this is dumb, i'm making myself cry and i have no idea why i'm even crying... Gaaah, i've cried so many times these last few days it's unreal. I spent ages at Gemma's crying my eyes out for no reason with her and Josh... I was sniffling a way like a noob in Psychology today, and Grant was so nice to me it made me cry even more because i barely even know him... Then i was talking to Ruth outside and on came the waterworks again... Then 'Dave' (aka Alan) was being really sweet, which is incredibly unusual and scary, and i was off again giving his shoulder a good soaking. Honestly, they should bundle me off to a third world country, i could provide water for a whole village the way things are going... I suppose alot of stress has been building up that i haven't noticed, and it's all suddenly letting itself out now. But i feel good... For some reason, all the moping and bitching and being generally moody with everyone has made me feel a whole lot better and i'm not sure why... Or maybe it's all the crying out of eyes heart and soul that's done it XD *sigh* i don't know, i suppose this is what life's all about at the end of the day... Coming across obsticals, throwing a tantrum, hitting them with a stick and then trying to figure out a way to get over them. Whatever. I've got my friends, i've got my family again, and somewhere out there i know i've still got my Joey... I also have a dog, but i haven't actually seen her since Monday night o____O I need a cat cuddle.. where is my stupid cat when i need him?? Probably roboting around outside with smarties tubes on his legs... I swear he likes it... That's probably the equivilant of being a drag queen in the cat world.. poor little bugger.. Ah well. Heroes is on now and it feels like forever since i last watched it. I need my fix. I'll probably come back on and rant again at some point, since my mind is still buzzing with things to wtf at... Yes. Now. Away. Before i start bloody crying again.

</pointless ramble>

Xaldin: I like graaapes!
Riku: LIAR!!!!

XD XD XD Omg ROFLMAOFOC XD ...I shouldn't find that half as funny as i do... But... XD XD XD

The Stupid Files is my new crack XD

I'm a gorgeous slut who looks at porn 24/7 XD XD XD Omfg, rofl.

Now you try!

1st letter of 1st name

A- Fabulous
B-Gorgeous
C-Pretty
D-Popular
E-Gangster
F-Girly
G-Dyke
H-Sweet
I-Retarded
j-Emotional
K-Lovely
L-Beautiful
M-Slutty
N-Preppy
O-Hot
P-Gay
Q-Punky
R-Hot
S-Sexy
T- Very Sexy
U-Ugly
V-Wonderful
W-Geeky
X-Bitchy
Y-Under-appreciated
Z-Over-appreciated


Now the Third letter in your middle name (if you dont have one use your last name):

A-pornstar
B- skank
C-Bitch
D-Obsesser
E-Fucker
F-Retard
G-Queen
H-Slut
I-Girl
J-Goth
K-Nerd
L-Motherfucker
M-Sex machine
N-Alcoholic
O-Geek
P-Babe
Q-Crackwhore
R- Beauty queen
S-Prince (ess)
T-Whore
U-Cry Baby
V-Jackass
W-Punk
X-Scardy Cat
Y-Coward
Z-Chocoholic


Now What Color Is the Shirt You Are Wearing:

Red- Who's Good With My Hands
purple- Who Looks At Porn 24/7
Orange- Who Likes It In The Butt
Yellow- Who Wants To Have Sex With You
Green- Who will do anything for Sex
Pink- Who Will Rock Your World
blue- Who wants to fuck everyday
White- Who everyone wants to screw
Brown- Who Wears Big Sunglasses
Black- Who Will Do Anything For Crack
Gray- who gives great head
None-who is a beast in bed

NOW REPOST THIS WITH THE NAME & STATEMENT YOU GOT
BEGINNING WITH " I'm a

aaah rofl. I have just discovered something. I can't make rollies. At all. I've never tried before, but my dad makes it look so easy, i assumed it would be a piece of piss... It wasn't XD I was on webcam to Em when i discovered this.

Emily: What in the hell are you doing?
Me: Making a rollie.. Or trying too <_< >_>
Emily: You're failing right now...
Me: *chucking baccy everywhere like a retard* yeah i know.
Emily: I thought you didn't smoke anyway..?
Me: I don't, i need it for Alex's art project. There we go *holds up triangular cigarette with baccy hanging out one end*
Emily: OMG XD You fail XD
Me: Yes. Yes i do.

So yeah.. i think i'll just nick one of someone else XD i did discover that my family has a stash of lighters in the cupboard o_O no idea why, but i've nicked one... Ahahaha, i just found the whole 'trying and failing to roll a cig' fiasco very funny indeed. I may just ask my dad to roll one for me... He probably will XD

That's all i have to say.

</ramble>

ROFL. That's all that needs to be said. On msn earlier (Emily the Great is Emily.. Kel is Kelli off RS.. And Happy Little Boozer is moi!)

{Emily the Great} Ima eat y'all now says:
YOU WHORES DON'T KNOW ANYTHING!!!

~~~Kel~~~ I wuv my snoogle flump bum <333 LULLZ! says:
We know more than you Em. You're delusional. Xaldin has a fuzzy butt.

//Happy Little Boozer\\ {Bring me my doink doink!} says:
ROFL OMG FOC!!!

{Emily the Great} Ima eat y'all now says:
Good god, are you alright?

//Happy Little Boozer\\ {Bring me my doink doink!} says:
I'm failing on the carpet. Fuzzy butt XD XD Just... Ew!

~~~Kel~~~ I wuv my snoogle flump bum <333 LULLZ! says:
YES! See Em, there is nothing attractive about the fuzzy butt monkey boy. I mean, sideburns?!?!

{Emily the Great} Ima eat y'all now says:
Oh STFU you two, I like his butt fuzz.

XD XD XD Ok... You, whoever you are, may not find this as funny as i do but... STFU!! I found it hysterical. That's actually going as my new screen name quote thing. 'I like his butt fuzz' XD XD XD ROFL!!! I don't know why, but that nearly made me pee myself laughing... I love the conversations i have on msn, i really do... Oooh, for those of you who have no idea what we are talking about, we are discussing Xaldin (from Orgy XIII.. Sorry, Organization XIII) and his attractiveness (or lack thereof.) ...Yes, this is the kind of sad, lame, nerdy stuff we talk about. Because we're just cool like that. But yeah, Em thinks he's hot, Kel hates him, i'm neutral. How do we know he has butt fuzz? ...I don't know XD We just do.

There, sorry, that's my pointless ramble for today. I just found that way too funny... Butt fuzz... Omg, butt fuzz... I will never be able to take life seriously ever again... Butt fuzz... *wanders off giggling to self*

</ramble>

ROFL, i owe my art teacher big time XD My mum has been completely set these last few days on sending me to Deeside college. She's refused to listen to anything i've had to say on the matter, and she'd even booked me an interview tomorrow. But then, lo and behold, she decided to ring my old art teacher Mr. Taylor. AND HE STOOD UP FOR ME! He said sending me to Deeside college would be a massive mistake and that only the real no-future no-hope people go there. He told my mum to give in and let me go to 6th form or she'll never here the end of it from me (he knows me so well XD) He's told me which courses i should take and how hard they're going to be and he's warning the new art teacher about me (git -_-).. But even so, it's thanks to him that i'm definately going to 6th form. I have to do another year of maths though *growl* bum. Buuut it's my own fault, so i won't complain TOO much XD I owe him big time now though, he'll probably have me cleaning his artroom every day for the rest of my life for this XD I'm in a very good mood now though, so i think i might take some art requests.. i MIGHT. I haven't decided yet XD

</ramble>

Waaaaaaaaaaa. I'm such a bloody procrastinator >___< Today i'm supposed to be sorting out my phone (which i've been putting off for weeks), cleaning my leather trousers (which are nice and muddy after BOA), and finishing off my room so i can put some blinds up and forget about it XD Instead, i've been sitting in my room drawing and occasionally throwing something heavy so it sounds like i'm cleaning =___='' I fail at life so much, i deserve to be shot! I just can't find any motivation at the moment.. 6th form starts in a few weeks and i basically need to get my act together. Sooo, as soon as i'm done typing this, i'm going downstairs and getting on the phone to those irritating people at customer services and i'm going to make them fix my phone whether they want to or not. Then i'm going to bloody well saddle soap my leathers till they're shining. THEN i will do my room and do a damned good job of it and put the blinds up myself, be damned if my parents are doing it for me. FINALLY i will collapse in a heap on the floor and refuse to move. Actually no, i'll finish the colouring i'm doing for Tsome over on ET, THEN i'll collapse in a heap on the floor and refuse to move. GOOD BAI!!!!

</ramble>

GAAAAAAH. Why must parents be so bloody indecisive?! "You're going to 6th form, you're not going to 6th form, you're going to 6th form, you're not going to 6th form, ooh look there's a coooow" ...They just have no idea. My general plan is that i'm going whether they want me to go or not. I want to go, i want to do A Levels, and i'd like to do a darn sight better in those than i have in my GCSE's. I KNOW i made a big old screw up of my GCSE's. I know i did badly. I know i'm a bad person who deserves to die in a ditch with poo on my head. I am capable of recognising these things. I also know that i am a human being (ohoho), and as a human being i happen to be very good at cocking things up. But you know what else i am? I'M BRITISH!!!! Yes. And we British people were born to just muddle along in our own time and do things the way we see fit. AND COMPLAIN ABOUT IT THE WHOLE TIME MIGHT I ADD!!! So that is what i intend to do. I intend to do my A Levels in a very British fashion, then i'll worry about the future when i get there. That seems fair to me. Every man woman and child is entitled to cock up a few times, surely? Especially me, as i'm a teenager, and we're always entitled to a bit more of everything than everybody else. That's how the world works! So. I have explained this to my mother and she looked at me in that way that she does. That same look she uses when i'm colouring the dog's eyebrows in or putting Smarties tubes on the cat's legs. Anyway, she looked at me and then she told me to go to bed and stop being stupid and we'd discuss this in the morning. I don't know how she plans to do that. Her and my brother are going ferret racing. Yes, this is what my family does in it's free time. They're going ferret racing and i'm spending the day with some Japanese person that my neighbor knows who is apparently going to become a Japanese tutor. Or something. And apparently they want a work experience student.. So i am her work experience O_O which is quite odd. Oh well, i'm sure she'll be nice. Well this was fun, i'm going to watch Dylan Moran now. Nighty bye.

</ramble>

I smoked with a cat because i'm sexy.

HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!! XD XD

You try now.

pick the month you were born in
1 - I banged
2 - I killed
3 - I ran shirtless with
4 - I raped
5 - I killed
6 - I cuddled with
7 - I needed
8 - I ate out
9 - I ran naked with
10 - I stabbed
11 - I slept with
12- I smoked with
Pick the day (number) you were born on
01 - the kool-aid man
02 - you
03 - a pornstar
04 - a toothbrush
05 - a horse
06 - a bag of weed
07 - a prostitute
08 - your mom
09 - a jew
10 - a homo
11 - the trojan man
12 - Paris Hilton
13 - a whore
14 - a cat
15 - a pickle
16 - paris hilton
17 - a bisexual
18 - a dog
19 - an orange
20 - a crackhead
21 - a bowl of cereal
22 - a easter egg
23 - my ex
24 - a condom
25 - a jar of honey
26 - a lesbian
27 - a homeless guy
28 - a french fry
29 - your dealer
30 - a stripper
31 - Ur grandma
Pick the color of shirt you are wearing
White - Because thats how i roll
Black - because im sexy
Pink - Because the lil people told me to
Red - because I have AMAZING boobs
Blue - because I'm a pimp and your jealous
Polka Dots - because I hate my life
Purple - because I'm gay
Gray - because I love marijuana
Other - because I have double D's
Green - because I'm beautiful
Orange - because I smoke crack
Turqoise - because I have a noodle in my nose
Brown - because i had to
Shirtless - because I've got abs

Yes, well, i found it funny. I have my thumb nail stuck in a pencil sharpener. That's how much of a genius i am. God.

I just got back from the doctors. I have glandular fever. Glandular fucking fever. I can't speak, which is hell for someone as talkative as me. I can't eat, which is even more hell as i happen to love eating. I'm not allowed alcohol (i like how that was the first thing the doctor pointed out) dairy products or any solid food for a week. A WEEK!!! Ok, alcohol i can just about live without.. Dairy products, same story (the Milk Maid is temporarily going into hybernation).. But no solid food?!?! That's just so cruel!! Why do you do it to me, God?! Well i know full well why i've got this fooking thing. I'm blaming Bloodstock, large amounts of alcohol and too many guys. Glandular fever is also known as the kissing disease. Oh joy, now i have to put up with weeks of my parents taunting me because i have the fooking kissing disease >___< I really REALLY want to eat something.. I refuse to live off fruit juice and soup for the next week. I might have a boil in the bag fish thingy... Fish is squishy, it won't do too much damage, right? Grrrrrrrr. I need to find out who is responsible for giving me this, and i need to kill them. Yes. I'm going to eat some ham, no solid foods be damned. Pfffft.

</ramble>

Just got back from Bloodstock... I can't speak. Seriously. Doing a pirate voice for 3 days straight is very tiring on the old vocal chords. And you can't get rid of the accent once you start. Which can be problematic. Oh well. I have to be walking the scurvy mutt now, so i'll rant about Bloodstock later, preferably when i remember how to type. Y'arr.