T= Tony Blair
M= Michael Howard
C= Charles Kennedy
MS= Madam Speaker
P= Public
B= George W. Bush

Note: Imagine these characters talking with chipmunk rodenty voices quite fast, k?

~ * ~

MS= Someone get me a cup of coffee!
*backbench dude goes running off for some Kenco*
MS= Mmm, that's better. Proceeed!
T= Right, so here on my lovely blank piece of paper, I propose that we increase the number of stealth taxes, and put the rates up by 10%!!! I need the money to buy Cherie something nice for her birthday. All in favour?
*Michael Howard stands up outraged*
M= No way, you doddering buffoon! You can't use the people's money as your own, least for all for Cherie!
T= Oh alright then; how about I buy something for George? Haven't seen him in a while. I wonder if he's still on holiday at his ranch in Texas.
*Charlie gets up, looking flustered*
C= Have yer listened to the way ye talk!?
*Tony raises a condescending eyebrow*
T= Have you??
C= Aye, I 'ave, an' I make more sense than yuu, ye bloodey swine. Who on Earth would be as stuped to vote fer yuu??
P= Err, that would be us! Sorry 'bout that!
*Public waves at Parliament*
C= Oh well that explains it all then, dun' it?? Ye shouldn't be given the right te vote if that's the sort'a vote ye make!
P= Well it was either him or you and we chose him. Go figure!
M= And what about me? I wanted to put a limit on immigration and give you the chance to go for the jobs they get!
P= Cockel picking??? You must be joking, sunshine. Get foreigners to do that.
M= How dare you?!!!
P= Well if I went cockel picking I wouldn't be able to go the pub, would I?
T= Oh so that's where your dole money goes, eh? Good investment! Tell you what, I'll increase your dole money by 20% so you'll have enough left over to spend on your kids. How's that sound?
C= Are ye pullin' me leg!?
T= No... why? Would you like me to?
*yankyankyankyank*
C= Stop that ye fool! Ye can't just give 'em more money! They spend it on booze, 'n fags, 'n all sorts'a garbage!
T= Alright then, erm... no more money for you people, so instead, more money for benefits for the immigrants!
M= Push off, you stupid sod! You can't give them money! They don't work to earn anything!
T= Well you'd complain if they did.
M= Send them home! Give the money to OUR people! They can go elsewhere! We've got too many foreigners as it is!
T= What like you?
*Michael sinks down in his seat and sulks*
C= Ye best park yer backside, Blair, else ye'll be gettin a caber tossed at yer head!
T= I didn't know you took part in the Highland games! Could you teach me a couple of things, Charlie?
C= Oh... ehh... yeh I dun' see why not.
T= Jolly! We can hire a nice hellicopter to take us up to Scotland on the weekend.
C= Where'd ye get that kind'a moneh?
T= Them!
*Tony points at the Public*
P= Whoa hold your 'orses sunshine, you ain't taking my money to pay for you to go and play ring-a-ring-a-rosie with carrot top over there.
T= Oh I wasn't; I was going to take everyone's money. That better?
P= Oh right I see... yeah that's better. Best that everyone chips in, eh?
C= Eh wait a second! Don't you call me a carrot top, ye stuped cockneh!
T= Oooh Charlie, Charlie you can't say that, it's not politically correct. Call him a Southern Londoner.
M= Oh give it a rest you stupid git! You can't take the tax payer's money to go and play games in Scotland! Are you really that retarded!?
T= PC, Michael, PC... can't say that word.
M= Oh yeah? Who are you to stop me?
T= Oh didn't you know? I'm ruler of this country so I can stop anyone and anything from doing stuff.
C= Ehhh... you're only Prime Minister, yer not king or emperor or summat...
T= Lmao! Oh Charlie old boy, but I am!!
C= YER WANT A PIECE OF ME!?!
MS= OI! No fighting in Parliament. Hang on; I'll be back in a minute lads.
M= Where the hell are you going!?
MS= To Ladbrokes. I want to put fifty on Charles. Don't start till I come back.
*Madam Speaker scurries off with her purse*
T= Oh you're such a lark, Charlie! You really are. It's all too obvious why you didn't win the Election.
M= Now you're going to bitch about him when the only reason you got voted in was because you were a default option??
T= No I was not! Who told you that? Was it Gordon!? It was JACK wasn't it!? They're both after my job, you know!
MS= I'm baaaack! Right, go on Charles! Beat that motherfucker!
*Tony glares wide eyed at Madam Speaker*
T= You can't say THAT!
MS= Hush up, Blair. Go on, Charlie! Kick his arse!
C= Err, yeh... right... erm... COME ON THEN, YE WEASEL, GET WHAT'S COMIN TO YEH!!
*Charles runs down the steps of the aisles and grabs the big gold sceptre off the big wooden desk thing in the middle of the floor, and proceeds to whallop Tony*
M= Where the hell's he trying to run off to!?
*Tony runs to the backbenches and talks to someone on his phone whilst Charles chases after him*
T= Haha! You're -ooooph!!- in for it now, mate!
C= OH YEH??? BRING IT, YE POMPOUS, GOOFEH TOOTH BASTAAAARD!
*SUDDENLY the doors of Parliament are flung open, and who should be standing there but GEORGE DUBYAH BUSH!*
T= Told you that you were done for!
B= What seems to be the problem, Tony?
T= It's Charlie, George, he's claiming he'll beat me up!
*Bush steps up to Charles and looks him up and down*
B= Son, do you know that you look like the spittin' image of a guy the FBI hunted down on suspicion of being a member of Al Qaeda?
C= No...
B= I have reason so believe you are hiding weapons of mass destruction.
C= That's a bunch of crock! Ah don't have any weapons!
B= Son, what are you holdin'?
C= A SCEPTRE, yeh stupid yank!
T= PC, CHARLES, PC!!
C= SHUT YER TRAP, YUU!
B= I shall have to take drastic measures. I must fight the war on terror and defeat the enemy. Come on boys, it's off to Scotland.
*Bush and his US troops roll out of Parliament and head up north*
C= NOW LOOK WHAT YE'VE DONE!!
T= It's all part and parcel of being PM, sugar. Don't hate!

[about me .1.]
-- Name: Louise
-- Nickname: Lou, Loopy
-- Birthdate: 16/5/88... go buy me something :)
-- Birthplace: Waun Fawr, Caernarfon, North Wales
-- Current location: Heywood, Lancs
-- Eye color: Bluey green
-- Hair color: Platinum/golden blonde... peroxide free
-- Height: 5'6 or 7
-- Righty or lefty: Righty



[about me .2.]
-- Your heritage: Welsh (Celtic), English, and possibly some Scandinavian
-- The shoes you wore today: Not worn any yet.
-- Your weakness: Chocolate, and saying 'yes' to people who don't deserve it
-- Your fears: Spiders, birds flying overhead because they have a tendency to shit on me...
-- Your perfect pizza: An edible one
-- Goal you'd like to achieve: Earning a seven figure income





[abaut me .3.]
-- Your most used phrase: Friggin hell
-- Your thoughts first waking up: Meh I'm awake... blech...
-- Your best feature: Hands or wrists, maybe eyes... I'll leave that up to you
-- Your bedtime: Whenever
-- Your most missed memory: Everything during year 9 and 10





[about me .4.]
-- Soda: Dr Pepper or Kinnie
-- Fast food joint: I don't really like fast food...
-- Single or group dates: Single
-- Adidas or Nike: Neither; I like Skechers
-- Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate mmmmmm
-- Cappuccino or coffee: Cappuccino





[about me .5.]
Do You:
-- Smoke: Nope
-- Swear: Way too much
-- Sing: Yeah but I'm all crappy because of my cold
-- Take a shower every day: Indeedy
-- Have a crush(es): Does [Xaero] count? He does?! Jolly good :)
-- Are you in love: Completely ^________^
-- Want to go to college: I am in college
-- Like high school: I didn't like it... got bullied all the time
-- Want to get married: Yeash pleashe :)
-- Believe in yourself: Sometimes
-- Get motion sickness: Only in the car, and I've got an empty stomach. Or if I read... ugh I hate that
-- Think you're attractive: I'll leave that to you
-- Think you're a health freak: No but I should be more conscious of what I eat
-- Get along with your parents: Yeah a bit
-- Like thunderstorms: Yeah
-- Play an instrument: Piano, sax, clarinet, violin, bit of guitar, recorder (don't laugh...)





[about me .6.]
In the past month...
-- Drank alcohol: No... it's due time for a piss up
-- Smoked: Nope I don't smoke
-- Done a drugs: No way
-- Had sex: Yeah... ;)
--Had unprotected sex: No
-- Made out: Indeedy
-- Gone on a date: No but I really wanna go to Wagamama in Manchester...
-- Gone to the mall: Yeah, I can't avoid it
-- Eaten an entire box of Oreos: Nope; don't get them over here
-- Eaten sushi: No, but I do like it
-- Been on stage: No... those days are over u___u
-- Gone skating: Nope
-- Made homemade cookies: Nope... mmmm cookies
-- Gone skinny-dipping: No but I want to :)
-- Dyed your hair: No
-- Stolen anything: Not that I know of lol





[about me .7.]
Ever...
-- Smoked pot, or done any other illegal drugs: Nope
-- Had Sex: Yep
-- Cheated on someone: Absolutely not >:(
-- Been in love: Yeah
-- Had your heart broken: Yeah... it's a bitch
-- Broken Someone else's heart: Yeah... sowwi... <:(
-- Played a game that required removal of clothing: No... wanna [Xaero]?
-- Been extremely drunk: Yeah I was hallucinating lmao!
-- Been caught doing something: Like what??
-- Been called a tease: Yep I have
-- Gotten beaten up: No thank god lol
-- Shoplifted: Nope
-- Changed who you were to fit in: Nah; I figured it would backfire if I did





[about me .8.]
-- Do you hope to be married: You've already asked me this haven't you?
-- Numbers and names of children: 2's my limit... boy and a girl... can't decide on names
-- Describe your dream wedding: Something big and proposterouly expensive ^________^
-- How do you want to die: Painlessly
-- Where do you want to go to college: I am in college
-- What do you want to be when you grow up: Commercial/freelance artist, authoress, illustrator, uni prof
-- What country would you most like to visit: Jordan





[about me .9.]
In a Guy….
-- Best eye color: Anything really
-- Best hair color: Something dark
-- Short or long hair: Long-ish
-- Height: Either my height or a bit taller
-- Best weight: Whatever's healthiest for them
-- Best articles of clothing: Baggy jeans! But not around the knees like an idiot emo kid... just low enough to show a bit off ass ;)
-- Best first date location: Wherever!
-- Best first kiss location: Wherever it feels right





[about me .10.]
-- Number of drugs taken illegally: None
-- Number of people I could trust with my life: [Xaero], Rizzie, Nadz
-- Number of CDs that I own: Many
-- Number of piercings: Ears, and I want my tongue done
-- Number of tattoos: None as of yet
-- Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: Once or twice I think
-- Number of scars on my body: Under 10 I think. Mainly cat scratches. My biggest is my cold burn.
-- Number of things in my past that I regret: Uber lots of things

Remember that there's a reason why you have a conscience: it's there for you to use it. Guide your judgements by your true gut instincts. Be honest with yourself. Don't pretend there will never be consequences. Don't cheat yourself by saying it doesn't matter. Think about what you're doing; the people you may hurt, the spirits you may break; the happiness you may plunder.

It doesn't take much to have a heart.

favorite color? Blood red, ivy green, black and pink, and blue
favorite gun? I'm against the possession/use of all firearms
favorite sport? Rugby
favorite basketball team? Don't have one
favorite football team? Again, don't have one
favorite baseball team? Same again
favorite boxer? Hate boxing
favorite rapper? Probably Ludacris because you can't take him seriously
favorite vidio game? Quake 3 Arena. It's the best stress reliever ever!
favorite food? Salmon!
favorite song ever? Oh don't make me choose...
favorite drink? Kinnie, but you can only get it in Malta...
favorite alcohal? Dark/gold rum, Baileys
favorite smoke? I don't smoke
favorite actor? Johnny Depp
favorite actress? Julie Walters or Goldie Hawn
favorite car? Nissan 350Z
favorite movie? Probably Overboard
favorite monster? I don't have one...
favorite killer? The guy who murders everyone in 'Copycat'... can't remember his name
favorite weapon? Either the railgun or rocket launcher on Q3A. In real life: NONE.
favorite rock? Obsidian. If you mean gemstone, then emerald
favorite dog? I love 'em all
favorite animal? I love most of them!
favorite T.V. show? Dirty Sanchez
favorite football player? Bleuch... hate football
favorite basketball player? N/A
favorite friend? They're all my faves!
favorite hobby? Drawing
favorite website? Not this one for sure...
favorite pair of shoes? My beaten up Skechers
favorite shirt? Probably Andy's Soil top. I intend on stealing it one day!
favorite pants? My torn jeans from New Look
favorite person in the world? Andy
favorite cartoon? DBZ!!!
favorite number? 3
favorite book? Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
favorite DJ? Don't have one in particular
favorite ice cream? Mint choc chip or caramel
favorite church? La Sagrada Familia in Barcelona, purely because of the architecture
favorite school? Ugh...
favorite item of wealth? Money duh!!
favorite injury? Probably all the cuts I get off my psycho cat lol
favorite possetion? My silver pentacle necklace
favorite place in the world? Not seen the whole world yet; I can't decide
favorite instrement? Piano
favorite scar? My cold burn scar. Don't play with deodorants... they will hurt you...
favorite feeling? Post-orgasm elated-ness lol!
favorite pinpal? Don't have one...
favorite painting? Don't make me choose this one either!
favorite T.V. system? One that works preferably...
favorite action movie? Anything Indiana Jones-y!
favorite comedy? Monty Python and the Holy Grail!!!
favorite horror movie? I dunno... I like loads
favorite hat? I only have one- my pink suede Von Dutch hat
favorite truck? Mitsubishi Warrior
favorite colone? Ehh, spelt wrong for one thing!! It's cologne dimwits. Let's generalise this: what's my favourite fragrance? Ocean Dream by Georgio Beverly Hills.
favorite body wash? St Ives Collagen Body Wash
favorite plant? Forget-me-nots.
favorite continent? Europe, because it's riddled with history and art
favorite day? 16 November
favorite alien movie? Signs
favorite pop? Kinnie